Go Ask Malice: Diary of a Teenage Serial Killer
by Blood Red Kisses
Summary: So let me start off. My name’s Samantha Puckett, but if you call me Samantha, I’ll kick your ass. I go by Sam and that’s it. I’m fourteen and in the eighth grade. And I’m a bit of a sociopath, so people say.
1. My Wonderous Introduction

Hey everyone! I've decided to start a new ficcy! Oh joy. Anyways, I've got two chapters written out and am working on the third. I honestly don't know whether to keep up with this or not, so you guys have to review and tell me. I have to know because I have other stuff I should be working on and if no one likes this, I'd rather work on that stuff. But I really like this idea, so I do wanna keep it going.

So, for the origin of this story...I'm in a psychology class and I've noticed Sam has a few APD (antisocial personality disorder) tendencies. She's practically guiltless and only serves herself. But she seems to really care about Carly. So I wanted to do something that played of those tendencies, but I had no idea what to do. So I thought, what if Sam killed someone? Wait, what if she kills a lot of people...Hmmmm....I could do that. Oh! And it can be told from a diary just like the Buffy book Go Ask Malice. Hence the story was born.

This will one day become a Sam/Carly ficcy, but for now, it's onesided. It's rated for abuse and possible rape in future chapters and Sam's mouth. I am well aware that 14 seems a little young, but after staying at one of my friend's house, I realized one can be ten and still be this....odd. So anyways, I hope you enjoy! And please, if you want to see more, review. And if there's something specific you want to see, feel free to ask. I'm all for ideas from you guys.

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9/23/04

Hello, World. Well, my school counselor says I have to keep a diary. She says she won't read it, that no one will, but that I have to write in it. So I say what the hell? Why not? Got nothing better to do.

So let me start off. My name's Samantha Puckett, but if you call me Samantha, I'll kick your ass. I go by Sam and that's it. I'm fourteen and in the eighth grade. I should be a freshman, but I failed eighth grade last year and gotta retake it. And I'm a bit of a sociopath, so people say.I like to think I'm being honest. Maybe brutally so, but hey, I live for myself.

There's only one person in the world I care about and that's Carly Shay. And she seems to be the only one who cares about me. She's the reason I failed the eighth grade, though she'll never know that. She's a year younger than me and I just didn't want to leave her side.

Anyways, since this is my first entry, I figured I'd celebrate happily. Which involves leaving that whore and her pimp outta this. So hello and goodbye.

Sam


	2. And the World Sucks Jack

So here's chapter two. I figured I'd upload another chapter, just because. But I still need to know whether to keep it going or not.

And just to warn you, the grammar is really bad in some parts of this chapter. But like I said, it's Sam's diary. I imagine her writing like this. So yeah, deal with it.... *ducks from flying objects*

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9/25/04

Sorry I skipped a day. God yesterday was suckish. That stupid Fredward kept bugging me all damn day! And to make matters worse, Jack, my mom's stupid 'boyfriend', had to go on one of his hissy fits. Mom said something to him and he whacked her. God only knows why she deals with that bastard. I wouldn't take that shit from anyone.

But she does. And it pisses me off so much. Oh well. As long as he don't touch Carls, I don't care. He can do what he wants to Mom. I already tried to help her. She ain't worth that kinda trouble.

But he still bothers me. He says things that make me wanna puke. Ugh, how can someone say that to a kid?

And then Freddie has to keep bothering Carls, always asking her out. She said no! Get the fuck over it! Stop asking her. It only makes her uncomfortable.

And school! Everyone won't leave me alone about it! They think that 'cause I hang with Carls and Freddie I'm supposed to be as smart as them! Well, hello, maybe I'm not! Maybe they're just my friends. And just 'cause they're my friends doesn't mean I'm smart. And even if I am ('cause Carls is convinced I am), that don't mean I give a damn. Even if I can do math fairly quickly in my head, even if I do get those stupid poems we read in class, even then, it doesn't mean I care enough about school to do the work. Jeeze, some people are just too lazy to care. I'm one of those people.

So right now I think Mom's downstairs with that asshole. He's probably got her bent over the damn kitchen table fucking her. And people wonder why I love staying at Carly's house. Better than mine, by a mountainous long shot.

I'm kinda hungry. I haven't eaten in two days. I think it's been two days. I really can't remember. Probably last time I ate was at Carly's, which would actually be three days. No way in hell I'm going down right now, though. But I could really use a sandwich or something. I'm tempted to sneak out. Carly wouldn't mind if I showed up in her room at 3am. Spence wouldn't either. But I just can't bring myself to bug her about this.

No one knows about my home life, not even Carls. I mean, yeah, she knows some stuff. Like my mom wearing her bikinis at random, and my jailed uncle, so on. But she doesn't know about Jack. Or the full extent of him, at least. She doesn't know he won't let me eat. That he hits Mom and sometimes me. That those days I 'skipped' school, I was actually locked in my room 'cause he threatened to rape or kill me. That to control me, he threatens to hurt her. No, she doesn't know any of that. And she never will. I'll never place that burden on her.

That's why I won't sneak out. That's why I deal with this crap. I said before I wouldn't take shit from anyone. Well, I'm forced to take it from him. There's nothing I can do. If I try anything, he'll kill Carly. And I'd rather him do the most horrible, unspeakable things he could to me than hurt my Carly Shay.

With Anger,

Sam

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So, I hope it's not too out of character. I always saw Sam as an abused kid. Or neglected. Or something. Anyways, if I haven't scared you off yet, reviews are always nice! Please?


	3. Jack's on Crack

Okay, I'm continuing this! Yay! I'm glad! I like this. But I'm kinda stuck right now with the next chapter. I introduced a huge plot twist that came out of nowhere and then introduced what I shall call 'The Beginning'. I didn't mean to start two big plots at once, but oh well. It's resolving itself fairly quickly and I hope you guys like it.

Thanks so much to those who review! I really need the encouragement, as this is something new I'm trying and I love hearing feedback. So keep reviewing please! And I hope you like this chapter!

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9/26/04

So today's a Saturday. I just woke up, so nothing interesting yet. I'm about to toss a change of clothes in a bag and head over to Carly's I'll write later when she's asleep.

Okay, I've been at Carly's all day. It's midnight-ish and she finally passed out. I'm snacking on some junk food and writing in this stupid diary.

Today started off absolutely terrible, but got a little better when I saw Carls.

When I had finished writing this morning, I stuffed some pants, a shirt, and sleep clothes into my bag along with the diary. I was opening my window when my door burst open. And there stood Jack, hands bloody, eyes on fire. Basically, our conversation went a little like this:

"Where do you think you're going, bitch?"

"I think I'm going out. And I'm pretty sure I'm right."

He glared and I growled.

"Don't be so sure, girly. You're grounded."

"You can't do that! You don't own me!"

"I think I do." He held up a wad of cash. "See, I been supplyin' your mom with drugs. And she can't pay back the full price. So she gave me you and I let her off. Got it?"

My eyes had widened. How could she do that?! Did my own mother hate me that much?!

I spit at him. "You don't own me and neither does that bitch." Of course, I tend to act first and think later, so I didn't quite realize that maybe I shouldn't spit at a man whose hands were bloody. I got a solid punch to the jaw and kick to the gut.

He stumbled over to me and placed his hands around my throat.

"You're my bitch now. Got it? You try and run and I'll kill that girl you hang with."

"Don't…you…touch…..her!" I gasped desperately for air, flailing my arms.

He smirked. "Then you obey me." He let go of my throat and left my room.

Damn it! I ended up punching a hole through my wall. I grabbed my bag and ran to Carly's house as fast as I could.

She had opened her door for me and I threw my arms around her.

"Carly!"

"Sam, what's wrong?" I pulled back.

I debated on telling her. Her life was in danger. I had to tell her. But I couldn't burden her. And besides, as long as I do what that bastard says, she's safe. So I just shook my head.

"It's nothing, Carls. Hey, let's play Pak-Rat!"

We played around for a little bit until we got tired. Then we headed to her room and talked. She dozed off a little while ago.

And now I'ma head to sleep. 'Night to anyone who bothers reading this...

Sam


	4. Getting Away With Murder

Hi, hi! Here's the next chappi! Sam confesses her crush on Carly! OMG! But only in her diary...

Okay, this isn't the best chapter in the world, but I was at a loss as to how to introduce the main plot. I hope this isn't too disappointing. It'll get better, I promise. Well, reviews keep me going! Thanks to y'all who reviewed! **Heartbrake Angel**, I hate Jack too. I was hoping for a seriously unlikable person and yay! I succeeded! He's a total jerkwad! Whoot!

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9/28/04

Sunday was spent at Carly's. Carls did her homework and I watched her.

I love watching her. She's so pretty, so mesmerizing.

Okay, I admit I'm totally in love with my best friend. But it doesn't interfere with our friendship.

I don't think.

Anyways, we had school today. God, it pissed me off so much. This boy kept messing with Carly. He kept flirting with her and at first, she flirted back. But then he whispered something in her ear and she got real offended. She told him to leave her alone and he wouldn't! He kept trying to flirt with her.

When he pushed her against the lockers and kissed her, I lost it. I grabbed him by the scruff of his neck, digging my nails into him as deep as I could.

"You leave Carly Shay the fuck alone now. Mess with her again and you'll regret it." I dropped him and he ran off.

Carls said I went too far with that one. She said she could've handled it herself. It didn't look like she could. And no one messes with my Carly. No one.

Sam

...

Shit. I've done something terrible. Well, I don't think it's terrible, but unfortunately, the rest of the world doesn't share my views.

I'm sitting in a back alley covered in blood. I can't go home and I can't go to Carly's. I only have my diary cause I was on my way to Carly's.

I can't really remember what happened. Only that I 'woke up' in a puddle of blood and got as far away from the corpse as possible.

God damn it. My head hurts so much. I know I killed that boy. I know I did. Honestly, I don't care that I did. I wanted him dead.

It's been ten minutes since that last sentence. My memory's slowly coming back. That jerk-boy tried to get Carly alone after school. Actually, I think he caught her on her way home. She told me he tried to rape her, but a police officer stopped him. I think that set me off. Like I said, no one touches my Carly Shay.

I think I tracked him down. Stalked him. Got him alone in an alley. And I vaguely remember beating the shit outta him.

I'm smiling now. I remember everything perfectly. He whacked me hard against the head, that's why it took me an hour to remember. But I do. I remember every little detail. From his screams of agony to his pleadings for me to spare his life, to his head splitting against the concrete.

He hurt my Carly. I had to punish him. It's justice. Carly can't sleep at night with him alive. Now he is no longer and she'll sleep in peace.

I'm back at my house.

I had waited three or four hours before leaving that little alley I had found. Police had come by and even with their dogs they were too stupid to find me. Luckily, no one saw anything. I guess I'm off the hook.

Which is good. I can't get sent to Juvie again and leave Carls. I've been in Juvie twice. Once when I was eleven for kicking the shit out of this boy. He called Carly fat and that made her cry. I almost killed him. Would have if the teacher didn't pull me off him. And the second time was last year for breaking and entering. I don't even remember why I did that. I think some punk dared me to and I figured why not.

Anyways, I'm glad the kid's dead. And I'm glad I was the one who killed him. I could get used to this, though. There are a lot of people who mess with Carly and I hold myself back 'cause I don't want to get caught and lose her. But I've always wanted to punish them for hurting her. And now that I know I can get away with it, why hold back?

Well, I'm pretty tired. So sleep is a definite now. I'm actually looking forward to school tomorrow. I wanna see Carly's face when she realizes he's been punished for hurting her. That he's gone forever and can't hurt her ever again. That my Carly will always be safe as long as I'm with her.

Sam


	5. Aftermath of Afterdeath

Hi, everyone! Well, here's the newest chapter! It's okay, I guess. Carly knooooooows. Okay, not really, but I bet you believed that for a second!!! Haha!

Something I haven't done in a while! Review replies! Whoot!!!

**Sharkofthemist120** Thank you! I love demented, crazy things. They're awesome! Hehe! And here's the next chapter! I shall update again ASAP. I'm currently working on the next chapter so hopefully it'll be out sometime tomorrow. If I don't get too busy...

**SquishyCool** Aww! Thanksies! I'm glad it went so smoothly! I was a little worried about that, truth be told. I hate Jack, too. It'd be so fun to kill him off. But I can't right now. Like you said, no plot if I did. I absolutely ADORE overprotective people! They're so fun to write! ^__^

So, I hope y'all enjoy this chapter! And 'member, reviews are luffles!

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9/29/04

Well, today was fun.

As soon as his name was called in class and he didn't answer, Carls looked up at me. I smiled at her, just like I would any other day. She knew I had something to do with it. Though I hoped she wouldn't care.

So classes went by normally until our last class of the day. Everyone got called into the gymnasium.

"We have just been informed that a good student of ours, Randy Trevouski, has been murdered." Good student my ass. Oh yeah, GASP! "He was found in an alley way not far from the school. We're going to hold a memorial service next Monday." Another reason for me to hate Mondays. "If anyone has any information, any at all, please talk to the police." Hey, I have some information for ya!

Jeeze. And Carly was so upset about this. She went straight home after the announcement and she told me to leave her alone. But of course, me being me followed her home anyways.

"Carls, what's wrong?" Honestly, why was she upset?

"Sam, a boy is dead! A boy we knew! Doesn't that freak you out?"

"No, not really. Besides, that kid was an ass!"

"We really have to work on your cursing habit…" If only she knew what I wrote in this diary. "Ignoring the fact that he was a total jerk, he's still dead!"

"So? That only means he can't hurt you again!" I guess my eyes were blazing about then, because Carly backed off. "Come on, Carls. I'll make popcorn and we can watch a movie."

"Did you have anything to do with it?"

"Why would you ask such a thing?" I kept my voice calm. Part of me wanted her to know just how far I'd go for her. But the other part knew she wouldn't handle it well.

"You know why." Her voice was so quiet.

"And if I did?"

"Sam! You can't! You didn't! Please tell me you didn't!"

I shrugged. "Okay, I didn't."

"Sam, seriously." You couldn't handle seriously.

"Don't worry about it. Whoever did this is not going to hurt you. I promise."

"How can you be certain?"

Because it was me. And I'd never lay a finger on you. "Because I'll never let anyone hurt you. Ever. Okay?"

She smiled slightly and it made my heart skip. It was a little odd. Normally when she smiles, it does make me happy. But this time, she smiled because I basically said I'd protect her.

"So, about that movie?"

We ended up watching Mr. and Mrs. Smith. I really didn't pay much attention to it. I was too busy thinking. Thinking about Carly, about the kid I killed, about the future. Just thinking.

Going home was the worst part. I wanted so much to stay and keep Carls safe. But Jack the Ass had to call and demand my presence back home. That was another fuuun conversation. If you can call that yelling match a conversation. Carly offered to walk me home, but there was no way I'd put her in that kind of danger.

So now I'm sitting on my craptastical bed that feels like it was made of stones and writing in this depressing book of doom. Wow, aren't I cheerful?

I want so much to talk to Carly, but Jack took my phone. That man has really got to go. But I can't do much. I'm only fourteen. It's easy to fight kids my own age or even older than me. A full grown man on drugs, that's a different story. Maybe Mom'll snap one day and kill him.

Welp, heading to sleep. Maybe tomorrow will be happier…

Sam


	6. I'll Always Protect You

Hi, hi! Whatsup, everyone. Hehe. So...I said I'd update two days ago...Sorry. The chapter has been done for a while, but I've been unable to update. I've been quite busy and I apologize for that. I hope this chapter can make up for it. It's fairly long (well, longer than some of the other chapters, I think). This is a much happier chapter. I figured I've been torturing the characters a lot, maybe I should give them a happy chapter. And this popped out.

**SquishyCool** Thanks! Hehe. That's why I adore this story! And don't worry. Jack will get his comeuppance one day. Maybe not today, or tomorrow, but one day. Ooooooone daaaaaay....

Enjoy and review!!!

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9/30/04

Today actually was a bit better than yesterday.

After the beating from Jack, anyways. I really gotta watch my mouth around that jerk. I can't help it, though. He says stuff that makes me so angry and I just can't help but snap at him. I swear, one day I'll kill him. I will.

But after that, I headed off to school and met up with Carls. She felt a little better since yesterday. Still a little shook up, but better nonetheless. I think it had something to do with iCarly being tonight. And the fact that I kept sticking my tongue at her. Hey, I had to cheer her up somehow.

After school, Freddie, Carls, and I headed back to her place for some iCarly rehearsals. Freddie can be so annoying sometimes, but today he actually didn't bother me. It's kinda surprising really, cause he normally pisses me off so much.

We recorded iCarly, goofing off as usual! It was so much fun! It's been a while since I had that much fun. We sprayed Squeezy Cheese in Freddie's hair, dipped Ritz crackers in the cheese, and ate 'em. iCarly is a great way to cheer up a crappy week.

And I got to stay at Carly's tonight! Well, I didn't actually have permission. See Jack still has my phone and he doesn't know Carly's number, so there's no way for him to demand me home. One would think the idiot would go through my phone and find Carls's number, but like I said, idiot…

We had a blast together. We ate lemon slices and played random games. Then I squirted lemon juice on her and we had a fruit fight. It was awesome!

We finally settled down and started talking. Unfortunately, our talk took a trip to the serious side. We talked about the dead boy.

"How about another movie, Carls?"

"Don't change the subject. They still haven't caught the murderer."

And they never will. "Don't worry about that Carly. As long as I'm here, no one will ever touch you."

She smiled again. That cute smile that made me happy, no matter how angry or depressed I was.

"I know." Such simple words had such a huge effect on me. "But I just keep thinking about it. I can't help but feel I'm responsible."

"You're not! You didn't kill him! No way this is your fault. He deserved this!"

"Sam, no one deserves to be killed!"

"Some people do, Carly. You know that as well as I."

"Well, maybe some, but him? He was only our age."

"And yet he tried to rape you." She winced and glanced to the floor. I'm just glad I wasn't there when he tried; I would've killed him right then and there. "Sorry…But I don't think that's someone who should be walking the streets."

She sighed. "You're right about that. But murder? Did he deserve that?"

My eyes flashed in anger. "Yes. That and much, much more."

"Sam…"

"It's the truth. Carly, he hurt you. I can't stand seeing you hurt. I'd rather…" She cut me off by slamming a pillow into my head. I must have looked bewildered cause she started giggling.

"Let's stop the serious discussion. It's getting to be too much for me." I noticed the tears in her eyes and whipped one away. Then I smirked devilishly and whacked her with my pillow. We went down in giggles and eventually fell asleep.

I woke up about an hour ago and grabbed the journal. Don't worry, Carly. I'll always protect you. You're my best friend, after all.

Sam


	7. The Letter Pain

Hi, everyone!!! It's been....about a year since my last update! WOOOOOW!!!! *Prepares to be killed*

First off, apologies, everyone! There is no excuse for my year long absence, and I just hope you guys can forgive me! ^^;;;

Second, I HAVE A NEW CHAPPIE!!! (Obviously...)

I was rereading my old fics and when I came across this one, I just had this urge to type! And I have four or five chapters done so far! I'm gonna post this one now, and the others tomorrow sometime!

There are probably some inconsistancies within the next few chapters, and probably will be there the rest of the story...I guess when it's been this long, it's to be expected...

But anyways...As always enjoy!!! And PLEASE review! I'm real curious to see if anyone's still actually reading this....

And yes, Rabbit Rabbit was totally used (stolen) from the Buffy book Go Ask Malice. I now say that at the beginning of every month, so I thought it'd be neat to put it in here.

And this is also about where the story starts to take a more depressing turn. (As if it wasn't already depressing enough...)

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10/01/04

Rabbit Rabbit

Okay, about that, my REAL Dad got me started on that. It's supposed to be good luck to say 'Rabbit Rabbit' as soon as you wake up (as the first thing you say that day) on the first day of each month. No clue why it is, but he said that when I three or so and I've been doin it ever since. Hasn't brought me good luck yet, but it's a habit.

So I just woke up and Carls is still sleepin. She looks so peaceful when she's asleep.

Instead of waking her, I think I might just head downstairs to get breakfast.

With Hunger,

Sam

Damn, it's about 10 tonight. Day was fuckin peachy, even more so than fuckin normal!

Yeah, Jack finally went through my phone and called Carly's place. Fuckin Spence had to answer and now he's worried about me. Made him swear not to say anything to Carls. I'm hoping he follows through with that cause what Spence heard on the other side of the line was not pretty.

Jack started cursin up a storm, demanding I get my 'pretty little ass back to the house before he scars it black, blue, and red'.

I guess Spencer hung up on him cause it wasn't until later that morning he told me what happened. Right as Carly and I were gonna head to school, he called me to his room and asked me who Jack was.

Now, I ain't scared of anything, but at that moment, my eyes had widened and my heart skipped a beat. I told him Jack was no one important, which he totally did not believe and then he told me what Jack had said, well, shouted, over the phone.

I had shook my head, told him I'd deal with it later, and made him swear on Carly's life not to tell her. And then, without a word to Carls, I ran straight home.

Not the best idea I had ever had cause when I got home, I got the livin shit beat outta me. I probably should be in a hospital right now, but ain't no way I'm goin there.

Honestly, I have no clue how or why I'm writin this down right now. Guess it's one of those times where I'm just so pissed, the pain doesn't bother me. I've also become fond of this journal. It helps a bit. And maybe when I'm finally caught and sent to jail for the shit I've done, someone will read this and let me out.

Or at least understand why I did the things I'm doing now.

Anyways, I won't go into the specifics of what he did, but I can tell you I'm covered head to toe in my own blood, got several large bruises covering my body, possibly (most definitely) some broken bones, and my chest and thighs hurt like a bitch.

But it doesn't matter what he did to me. Fuckin ass hat kept mentioning Carls. Swore I was gonna kill him right then and there, and I would have, if I could move.

I really don't know if I'll be able to make it to school tomorrow. I need to, though. Already left Carls alone for one day. God knows what happened today with her. I hope she's okay.

Another downside to goin to school is I won't be healed by tomorrow. She'll notice the bruises, the limping, she'll know and I can't bother her with this. She's already got so much on her plate...

The fact that that punk ass kid is dead is still affecting her. This would devastate her.

But leaving her alone for two days is devastating enough, at least for me...I try so hard to never miss school unless she's not gonna be there anyways. Gotta protect her, and if I'm not there…

Well, I guess I could wear long sleeves and long pants to cover the bruises. Have to walk as normal as possible. This is really gonna suck.

Well, hopefully I'll feel better tomorrow.

Gonna go shower now. Hope the blood washes off easily enough. Shower's gonna hurt.

Royally Pissed

Sam

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Whelp...It's kinda short for a year long update...*Ducks thrown objects*

I've got TONS more to come later though!

But unfortuantely...This has become less of "Teenage Serial Killer" and more of "Teenage Angst Kitten"...

She does kill again later, though, so that's good! ^-^

By the way, the phrase "ass hat" belongs to my friend Mel. She's the first one I heard use that insult, and I've become fond of it.

And also, I'm sure (hoping) you guys are wondering if Jack raped Sam or not. (Based on the "chest and thighs" comment.) I honestly haven't decided if he did rape her, or just beat the crap out of her and those area hurt, too. I guess it's up to you guy's imagination! The story goes on to fit either scenario because Sam doesn't focus too too much on it. (She's too concerned about Carly. ^-^) Soooo...whatever you think would be best...


	8. Hiding Broken

Hi again!

Well, I seem to have only gotten one review, which is awesome! Yay for reviews! But yeah, I'm gonna respond. Yay! ^-^

**sockstar**: If Freddie even knew what Jack was doing to SAM, he'd help. But Sam is just too damn proud to tell anyone (Plus she doesn't want to be a burden to anyone...). She's that type of person who thinks she can handle her problems on her own and that even if people knew, they couldn't help, so why bother telling them if it's only going to hurt them. That's how she sees it......Heh, sorry for the long ramble just to answer one simple question.

By the way, just to let you guys know, I don't hate Freddie at all. This diary is told from Sam, and she DOES hate him. More so here than in the actual show. (I'm not much of a Seddie shipper, though, so I don't really care for their relationship in the show.) Just thought I'd let y'all know, cause she gets UBER pissed at him in this chappie...

Also, I've noticed, she curses A LOT more in these recent chapters than she ever did in the past. Inconsistancey, I guess, but for the sake of the story, more crap is happening now than it ever has before! ^-^ Soooooo, read and PLEASE review!

I'll give you a cookie if you review!!! ^-^ They are luffs!

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10/02/04

Well, another fuckin peachy day.

As you could guess, Carls knew right away something was up.

First, I did leave her house without a word. And second, I wasn't at school yesterday.

Smooth move on my part.

Then Freddie the Dumbass bumped into me and I, being too stupid to bite my tongue, yelped in pain.

Another smooth move.

"Sam, what's wrong?" Carly's eyes were wide with fear. No matter how hurt I am, I never cry out in pain. So the fact that I just did had her freaked.

Perfect………

I, of course, told her nothing was wrong.

And she called me a liar. "You're hurt! What happened? And why the long sleeves?"

I guess this was the third clue, before the yelp, that something was off. I very rarely wear long sleeves and long pants, even in the winter.

"I'm not hurt; I'm just tired of Fredward being a dumb klutz and always bumping into me!" Oh WOW, that was a pathetic lie! If I could, I'd have hit myself!

Even Freddie knew that was a pathetic lie! And he promptly told me so.

And I told him to shut the fuck up, adding in a nice nickname of 'fuckface'. He looked quite shocked. I'd get mad at him, but I usually could contain my language. So I've never cursed at him, mostly for Carly's sake though, and he was surprised when I did.

Carly even scolded me for it.

"Nothing's wrong guys! Now can we get to our next class? We're gonna be late, which frankly, I don't care, but I'm sure you two do!" I had directed my anger at Freddie, but Carly still looked hurt. My eyes had softened. I never wanted to hurt her. And I never wanted her to know about this.

I apologized to her and hugged her. She hugged back, but it was weaker than normal, which I was sort of happy for because I hurt like all hell got loose and attacked me. My body felt like it was on fire, and I swore I was gonna vomit from the pain, but I honstly think I felt worse for hurting Carls.

Freddie didn't say a word to me the rest of the day, which helped my day, but neither did Carls, which killed me. I mean, she'd say little things, but never like we normally talked. I kept apologizing the whole day. I felt so awful! And I still do…

She finally did turn to me. "Why can't you tell me why you're hurt?"

So that was all it was. I thought I had hurt her by yelling at Freddie and half at her...

"Because it's not important." And it really wasn't. Jack beat the shit outta me. 'Nuff said.

And even if it was important, it's nothing compared to what he could have done to you, Carls...

"It's important to me!" Her eyes were filled with tears.

"Oh god, Carls, don't cry!" I felt so bad.

"My_ best friend_ in the _whole world_, the person I _care the most for_, is hurt and she won't tell me why!"

Is it bad that my heart fluttered at that comment before I even registered that she had started crying?

Freddie had said something about making her cry, but I didn't pay attention. I don't give a rat's ass what he says.

"Carly, I got in to a fight. I'm fine. It's over. Please don't cry..." And that time, it wasn't a lie. It was only part of the truth, but it WAS the god damned truth!

"How bad was it? You've been in fights before, but you've never yelped like that."

I had shrugged. "I guess it was pretty bad, but I'll be okay, Carls. I promise you." I'll be fine. I'm a tough cookie. Jack can do whatever the hell his dirty little heart desires to me, and I'll always be okay for you.

I wanted to add that in, but I held my tongue. I wish she knew the full extent of what I'd do for her.

I knew she didn't completely believe me, but she accepted what I said. For now, anyways. Freddie was still pissed at me, but I didn't care. And of course, I still don't. God I wish he'd disappear.

I'd love to kill him, but then Carly would really be depressed. She's not IN love with the kid, but she does love him. Makes me wanna yak.

I had to sneak back into my room through the window to avoid Jack. Didn't want another beating, though I figure if he really wanted to, it'd be unavoidable…

I guess I'll try to get to sleep while I can.

Don't know if I'll be able to with the image of Carly crying because of me seared into my brain.

Sam

* * *

Sooo...Another short one, but ya know, I figured, who actually writes more than this in a diary? I kind of figured it was about the proper length for diary entries, especially from a girl who didn't care to write in it in the first place.

But anyways...Reviews are so nice! They do (despite my year long absence; I'll never let myself live that down...) encourage me to write more. In fact, one reason I decided to look through my old fics was because I met a girl here at college who writes and we were talking about our reviewers...And I felt guilty for lettin y'all down....

So anyways, REVIEW PLEASE!

And to give y'all a reason to review, I'm gonna ask a question! Who here has seen Lord of the Rings?!?!?! ^-^


	9. Death to 'Prince Charmimg'

Hi, again!

Yay! I have an awesome reviewer! Soooo, response! ^-^

**sockstar**: HII again!!! That's weird that your review got lost...Never had that happen before... . As for Freddie getting involved, that's gonna be hard to write out...The problem is, Sam kinda...sorta...detests Freddie, so it'd be a little hard to do that. Plus, I can't kill Jack until the very end (if that)..He's like a little pest that'll always be there because if I kill him off, there goes the main villian, pretty much. He can't go yet. He's the tormentor in Sam's life and without him there, she can be happy, and I just can't let that happen. . My charries are not allowed to be happeh! Heh heh...But I'll try to get him more involved later on, if you want. It won't be until later because I've already written up to Chapter twelve, and I'm half way through thirteen. But I shall try! ^-^

But anyways, here's the next chapter! Not too good, but yay for another killing!

* * *

9/05/09

Hey, it's been a few days. Well, I can explain that.

Ya see, it's cause a few days ago, another kid was messin with good ole Carls. Well, hassling is more like it. He wanted a spot on iCarly and she told him she'd try. But he COULD NOT take that for a fucking answer! So what did he do?

He started sending her emails, text messages, the works about getting him on or else.

This, needless to say, annoyed her.

When I'd go over to her house, she'd rant about getting so many texts from him! I mean, he could fill up an empty inbox in ONE fucking day!

So I, kindly, of course, told him to back the fuck off. He spit at me.

Bad fucking move on his part.

Anyways, I decided to deal with him myself.

My first kill was out of pure anger and vengeance. It was messy and I'm honestly surprised they never caught me. (I haven't been payin attention to the news, but I think they gave up. Or something. I don't really care.)

This one…was a lot neater.

I called him and told him to meet me at the mall and we'd talk about his spot on iCarly. He asked why Carls wasn't talking to him about it and I told him she was busy writing up some stuff he could do. She is, after all, the brains of the operation.

So we met up and I faked the whole conversation.

Then, being more familiar with the alleys, discreetly led him there. He was too busy rambling on about all the shit he wanted to do on the show to notice where we were heading.

When he mentioned wanting to do a 'Prince Charming' episode where he and Carly kiss, I got pissed and swiftly rammed his temple against the brick wall. Luckily, his head hit the concrete so hard, he passed out. He bled like a struck pig from the large wound on his temple. Without getting any blood on me, that I could tell, I left him there to bleed out.

I'm so glad I caught him off guard. If he had been aware of what I was gonna do, he could have easily overpowered me. I'm still not completely healed from Jack's beating. But I had a bit of luck on my side so when I grabbed his head, he was too shocked to move away.

I really hope Carly (or the police for that matter) doesn't make the connection that it's me doing this.

I mean, two guys that bothered her are dead. With her knowing that'd I'd protect her at all costs, things kinda looks bad on my part.

Hopefully, no one will find this guy for a while, though. I was a lot cleaner this time, so no one should find him.

I wonder if he'll be the one I get caught with. I guess that'll be the part that thrills me, wondering how long I can get away with this. How long I can protect Carly before I'm finally dragged away from her.

Maybe I'll kill some of the asses that bothered Carls when she was younger.

Cause honestly, not many people mess with her now she's on iCarly. Usually, it's psycho fans that wanna be on the show, maybe a few online flamers, or the occasional jock boy flirting with her. But she usually lives in peace.

Which is good. I'm glad she's not being bullied or anything. But I've always wanted to make it up to her for not being able to protect her as a kid. I would always beat the kid up that would mess with her, of course, but I could never completely get rid of him. All these bullies...they torment her in her nightmares. And I can't do anything about it.

Anyways, enough of my self loathing. Gonna shower and head over to her place.

Maybe we could get some studying in before we have to go to sleep.

Sam

* * *

Really short, really not descriptive, kinda sucky...

I realized when writing the most recent chapters, it's REALLY difficult to get a story in where she kills a bunch of people. The only reason she kills is to protect Carly, and as Sam mentioned, not many people mess with Carly anymore. So it's real difficult to find a time to insert a killling...And it's hard being real descriptive about it too. Haven't read much about how killers actually do their killing, so I'm not sure what all to add in here...

So it kinda sucks...But please, tell me your honest opinions. I'm curious to see what y'all think. Reviews are definitely appreciated and I'll respond to each of them...It's just always nice to see feedback, even if it's 'good fic/bad fic' type reviews. I just like to see something there.....


	10. Suspecting Abuse

Woot! Okays, so another chapter is out! Yay!! Review responses!

**sockstar**: Yay! Thank you SOOOOO much for the suggestions! I really appreciate them! I wasn't really creative with the first two deaths...And I so should have been...But thanks to your suggestions, I have ideas now! ^-^ I already have up to thirteen written out, buuuuuut, I've already started up on things on that chapter...MWAHAHAHA!!! I'll be getting a lot more creative with the deaths soon enough. Of course, this is a bit realistic because most serial killers, when they start out, they're real messy and botchy. Just look at Dexter! (Assuming anyone reading this has seen Dexter...)

**Cam Fan**: Wow! Reading your review seriously made my day! ^-^ I'm glad I'm keeping them in character! As I type, I always try to imagine the characters' voices. I try so hard to keep them in character, because there's nothing more irking than a great plot, awesome writing style, and...out of character characters...But anyways..I'll definitely be keeping up with the killings thanks so much to Sockstar! ^-^ Sam's definitely obsessed with Carly, but she manages to keep a handle on that. She doesn't want Carly to ever be hurt by anyone, herself included. Aaaand sorry for the short chappies! *Sweatdrop* This one's no longer than normal.......

So yay for awesome reviewers!!! *Does happy dance*

Hehe! Anyways, hope you enjoy this chapter!!

* * *

10/06/04

Sunday here already. Crazy, huh? Carls and I had fun last night. We watched some stupid comedies and threw popcorn at each other, my favorite pastime with her. Freddie came over around midnight complaining he couldn't sleep.

So we were forced to entertain him. Booooooring.

I raided Carly's kitchen like no tomorrow. After killing that kid, I was starving!

Freddie showed us some stuff on Youtube that he thought was funny and I fell asleep sometime during that time.

Today really sucked. Breakfast was great, though. So obvious what's on my mind.

Spence burnt the pancakes he was trying to make and almost set the apartment on fire cause of the bacon. That was kinda fun! Well, it was for me anyways. No one else seemed to appreciate my sense of humor.

But Carly wasn't feeling very well today, so she rested and I checked in on her every now and then. I really did not wanna go back to that dump, but I also didn't wanna bother Carls too much.

Hanging with Spencer was interesting…to say the least. Probably could have done without it…

He asked me again who Jack was. I asked if he mentioned anything to Carly and he swore he didn't.

So I told him Jack was my mom's boyfriend and left it at that.

Or tried to anyways.

"Why was he yelling for you to go home?"

"Didn't finish my chores."

He gave me the look that said he knew I was lying.

GOD! Why is it these people knew when I was lying?! Why couldn't they just be naïve and accept what I tell them at face value?

So I shrugged.

"Don't believe me, but it's true."

"What really happened? Carly's been worried about you. She said you got into a fight a few days ago. You do look beat up. And you're walking funny. Did he hurt you?"

I've never seen him look so protective since Carly got hurt last. And since then, well, it's very rare.

"No!" I tried to laugh it off, but he just deadpanned me. "What? You want me to say yes? Like that's gonna change anything?"

"You can call child services on him!" Seeing Spence this serious was so weird for me!

"Ain't worth it." I thought about how he threatened Carly's life and it's not worth the risk.

"How is it not worth it?" He couldn't understand why I wouldn't call them. He wouldn't even if I told him the real reason. He'd say child services could protect her too. They can't. Jack's more powerful than he thinks.

"I've considered calling, weighing pros and cons. Ain't worth it. Just trust me on this one, Spence. Please."

"How bad did he hurt you?"

"Never said he did. You made that assumption." Probably not the best thing to say...

"Sam!" He was clearly getting pissed. Thinking about it now, it was kind of sweet that he worried for me. But at that point in time, I was also getting pissed.

"Spence, drop it."

"Did he break anything?"

It was then Fredward decided to walk in. God I hate that twerp.

"Break what?" He was confused and if I hadn't been so irritated, I'd have laughed at his expense.

"Nothing, Freddork."

He kind of backed away when he saw me. I guess I scared him real bad that one day. Good.

"Sam, did he break anything?"

"Freddie's here, Spence. Drop. It."

"Did he?"

"No!" I screamed at him. Total lie... "Why can't you people leave me alone? It's my fucking problem and I'll fucking deal with it!"

Now Freddie really backed off. Guess he wasn't used to people cursing. With that mother he lives with it's no wonder.

But I never did hear if Spencer had an answer. I headed straight out the door, leaving all my shit there in Carly's room. I wish he had never said anything. I didn't like seeing him so serious, so concerned for my well being. He's Spencer Shay for Christ sake! He's supposed to be goofy and set things on fire with all his art projects! Not concerned and worried and interrogating me about my home life!

So here I sit, writing in this dumb thing, wishing I could reverse the day and just tell Spencer a convincing lie.

I really hope he can forgive me later. And doesn't tell Carly. Now that possible abuse has been revealed, he may call the cops. And God help him if he does.

Sam

* * *

OMG CLIFFIE!!!! Well, kind of a cliffie anyways. MWAHAHAHA!!

Not too sure how y'all will feel about this...I will tell you, though, Spencer knowing won't make too much of a difference. It won't interfere with her killing or anything. I also did NOT plan for this chapter to go this way. Originally, it was going to be a fairly boring day of Sam taking care of Carly. Then the Jack thing got brought up, and my fingers went on their own merry little way writing whatever sounded good to them...And ultimately, this was born. I guess it could be considered a slight turning point or something, but either way, it's going to be interesting to write!!!

Oh, and depending on how late I stay up, I may have the next chapter out tonight or most likely tomorrow morning. I'm not too sure yet...

I am, however, definitely go back to writing this! So I'll be starting chapter fourteen sometime tonight. Got homework to finish first, though...

REVIEWS ARE LUFF!!!! YAAAAYS!!! ^-^


	11. Home Alone

Hey again!

So I'm a day late..Sorreh! ^-^; Busy day yesterday.

**hayden**: Thank you! Yay, pity poor Sam-Sam! Her life does suck...

**plug in baby57**: I already responded to your comments, so no real need to here. But thank you once again for all you pointed out. Heh, I'll definitely be adding a bit more detail. I just never reall thought about it since it's a diary. That does kinda limit what I can do...Ah well..I'll start timing stuff better! ^-^

**sockstar**: I could see a slight few accidental killings, but not too many. The reason she's killing is to protect Carly, but if there was danger of her getting caught, I could see her killing a random bystander.

**Drag0nL0rd**: She wouldn't kill Spencer. That was a general comment about the can of crap that would be opened if he did get the cops involved. But she definitely would never kill Spencer because Carly adores her older brother and it'd kill her if anything happened to him.

Yay!! Thank you, everyone, for all your reviews and support! I really appreciate everything that's said!! Sorry the responses aren't as long; I have a class to go to in a few minutes, so I'm rush-posting this to make up for yesterday!

Enjoy!!!

* * *

10/07/04

Well, Spence hasn't told Carly, or Freddie, or the cops.

Yet.

And I hope to anything that's out there that he never does.

The crappy thing today was PE. Now since Jackass's beating, I've been able to get out of PE by sympathy from the teacher. Told her I got jumped walking home and she felt bad.

Today, we had a sub and he didn't seem to care.

So I had to do PE.

Now, most of the bruises were gone…But since I never went to the hospital, the bones never healed. So it was quite painful…

But I got through without grimacing or anything. No one in the class noticed, not that anyone would care.

But Carly did notice. Of course she did. She's my best friend.

She kept her mouth shut, but she watched me all throughout PE.

The rest of the classes consisted of me pretending to pay attention and 'take notes'. I got called on in Math to answer some random question. I said six and was SERIOUSLY surprised when she said "That is correct. Good job, Samantha." I also cringed at hearing my full name. I gave her a solid glare and told her not to call me Samantha. Don't think she'll listen, but whatever.

Decided it was too soon before going back to Carly's house. I don't know if Spence has forgiven me yet. I actually asked Carls how he's been and she told me he's been strangely quiet lately...So I stayed home. Slept most of the day, got up, and started writing.

Anyways, seems Jack and Mom are out somewhere, so I get the house to myself today. Yay…Gonna grab a 'snack' while I can, assuming there's even any food in the house. Usually they only go out when there's no food. Be back in a sec to tell about my horror adventure into the Kitchen of Doooooooom!!!

Aaaaaand that was unsuccessful...

There's seriously no food in the house worth touching. There are a few expired things that my stomach is begging me to eat, but like hell I'm subjecting myself to that shit. I'd rather starve...Which since I haven't been to Carly's is what I'm doin right now. Oh well...I have a little Halloween candy leftover that I'm snacking on for now. It ain't much, but it's something.

This house is so boring...I should've gone to Carly's. With Jack and Mom out at dinner, my absence would have gone totally unnoticed. Not that they usually notice anyways, but I'd have been in the total safe zone.

Maybe I'll go over later. For now, I'm gonna nap...

Write later...

Sam

* * *

Alright, so this is actually a LOT longer than it originally was going to be. I added in soooo much! But since I seriously have to get to class, I have no time to proof read it..I'm going to post it real quick and I'll reread it later. If I notice too many mistakes, I'll repost a corrected version later! I just want to go ahead and get this out!

So as always, keep those reviews flowing! They are my BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!! RAWR! ^-^


	12. iCarly Plus Whipped Cream Equals Win

Sooo...It's been a little while...Gah, college is tiring. But I did go grocery shopping today! ...Not...that anyone here really cares.......

But umm....REVIEW RESPONSES!!!

**Drag0nL0rd**: Your review....Omg...First off, thank you so much! And second....If Carly and Freddie started dating...Sam would...Sam would.....go cra...zy....or someth-THEY'LL NEVER DATE BECAUSE MY HEAD WOULD E'SPLODE IN THE PROCESS!!! *Huff huff* Ummm...Heh...Excuse that slight mental breakdown...To be honest though, I have NO idea what Sam would do. She'd feel betrayed though. Really depressed and angry and all that nice stuff. Maybe she'd just seclude herself, keep an eye out for Carly from a distance. Like still protect her, but not see her for a while...Or who knows? I obviously don't. Heh heh..

**sockstar**: Ahhhh, someone's a Spam fan, I assume! Hehehe! They're so cute together, aren't they? But alas, this is a Cam fic..Maybe I'll add some Spam subtext in, like him really worrying about her. Heh. I'll think of somethin!

**Samantha**: Those four words do mean a lot to me!!! Yay! *Glomp* Thank you so much!! Hehe! Well, here's an update, so please don't go mental!! Then we'd have to put you in a straightjacket! DUN DUN DUUUUUUN!!!

**Hotcutii3**: Yay! Glad ya love it! Hehe!

Hope you enjoy the next installment of Malice!!! Don't forget to leave your feedback!!! Hehe!

* * *

10/08/04

Today was pretty good, all things considering. School was boring and annoying as always...But we finished filming iCarly a little while ago. That was a lot of fun!!! Seeing Spencer was a little weird, though.

He just gave me a nod, asked how I've been, and that was all. I wonder if he's still mad.

Carly said he's not mad at me. She said he's worried, but not mad. She still has no clue why and I keep telling her I don't know either. I do hope Spence gets back to normal soon...

But anyways, back to iCarly. We had a lot of fun. We 'accidentally' decided to have a whipped cream fight. Well...I kept spraying the stuff on Carls!

Is it bad that that kinda turned me on...?

Guess I am a freak.

But it was fun. Especially when she sprayed some down my shirt.

That was pure win.

I think Freddie got a little jealous too. He just had this look that was like 'how come I don't get any?'

Score one for Sam!

I did spray some on his face. Not what he was hoping for, I'm sure, but whatever.

But the way we ended was both Carls and I sprayed whipped cream on the camera and Freddie eventually blacked it out.

After the show was done filming, I jokingly licked Carly's cheek. It was mostly cause I wanted to, but a little to make Freddie even more jealous. She squeaked and told me not to do that, so of course I did it again. And she shoved me away jokingly. That was of course fun.

We ended up laughing for a good while. I'm glad we did. It's been a while since I've laughed. And laughing with Carly, and even Freddie, was just what I needed after such a long time of...well, whatever you wanna call the crap I've been going through.

Of course, Freddie had to fuck it up with one little question.

"How have you been at home?"

Did he know? He couldn't.

I shrugged that typical nonchalant shrug that I always do when I don't wanna talk about something.

"It's okay. Mom hasn't paraded around in a bikini in a while, so I can't complain."

Carly laughed a little. "Yeah, that is a good thing. It always worried me when you'd say she'd do that...Like what is she thinking when she does it?"

"Who knows? She's nuts." I chuckled a little, blowing off the whole thing as if it were nothing. Mom doesn't really walk around in her bikini, but it was what I said when I felt like ranting about her and Jack doin it in the kitchen, hallway, bathroom, right out side my door, etc. 'Bikini' works better than 'sex' by a long shot...

And that awkwardness pretty much ended there.

Okay, so he didn't really fuck anything up, but he shouldn't be asking stuff like that. It may get Carly wondering about my home life. Spencer already kind of knows, and I don't need her knowing too. I just don't think I could handle her worrying about me. She should worry about school and iCarly, not me.

Well, after more goofing around, I decided I didn't wanna go home tonight, so I'm crashing at Carls's place. Freddie left a little while ago and Carly's showering right now and when she's done we'll probably watch a movie and then head to sleep.

But while she's doing that, I think I'm gonna grab some food. Dinner was awesome, but I'm hungry again! Hopefully I'll be back before she's done.

Wow....I ended up being down there longer than I expected. Luckily, Carly's still showering...What is she doing in there that's taking so long?!

But while I was raiding the pantry for some easy food, Spencer wondered over to me.

"I haven't told anyone." It was a simple statement, but it meant a lot.

"I know. Thanks Spence. You should cheer up, though! You're somberness is really worrying Carly."

"And you're worrying me..."

"Again, thanks. It means a lot that you're so concerned, but really, you shouldn't be."

"How should I not worry over someone that's possibly being abused? Over my little sister's best friend?"

"Just know I can take care of myself!" He shifted uncomfortably. "Look Spence, I'm real sorry you ever had to find out. I wish I could go back in time and just erase that entire conversation."

"I don't. Because then I couldn't help you at all. I wouldn't know..."

"You can't help. I have to deal on my own. But if things get real bad, I'll come to you for help." I didn't mean that last part, but I had to comfort him somehow. And it worked. He looked a little more like his normal self.

"Alright, Sam. I'll take your word for it. But I hope you mean it. If that bastard ever hurts you beyond repair..."

"He won't. Remember, I'm Sam! People don't hurt me; I hurt them!" I made a fist and punched the air. This seemed to make him laugh a little. "So stop worrying about me and start making your goofy art projects again! Carly misses them!"

"I will, Sam. I will." His eyes lit up. "OH! Did I tell you about the newest thing I've been thinking about?" And then he began describing some art project having to do with a bunch of clocks, coat hangers, and a lamp. I headed back upstairs after our conversation and was surprised when I found Carly was still in the bathroom.

Now I'm snackin on chips and salsa and just thinking about all the stuff that's been going on.

Oh! Carls just came out of the bathroom, so I'm gonna stop writing and we'll get to watchin that movie! For Carly sake, I really do hope Spencer is back to his normal self.

Sam

* * *

And done! Wow, once again, I added a LOT in here that wasn't originally! Like the conversation between Spencer and Sam! Heh, totally not planned! But Sockstar, did you enjoy that? As I wrote, I was like, SPAM HIIIIINTS! YAY! I enjoy writing conversations, even though very few people probably write them out word for word in a diary....Heh heh....

But yeah, I like how this chapter turned out. I originally had no clue what to really do with it...But now, it seems like it actually added to the plot (kiiiinda...) instead of just being another boring day with nothing really progressing....

As always, reviews are love! Pleeeeeease send em in!!! YAY!!!!


	13. Algebra and Doorbells

Hi, hi! How's everyone been...? .

**Hotcutii3:** Yay! Glad you love it!

**Drag0nL0rd**: Time machines are awesome! And who knows? Maybe that's what he _is_ workin on! Wooooo!

**xoxolovemehatemexoxo**: A broken arm, eh? I could probably work that in. The only difficult part is balancing two plots at once: Sam killing, and Sam being abused. I didn't really think about it when I introduced the two together...

So I've had this written out for a while, but just haven't gotten a chance to post it...Sorry! I hope it's a pretty good chapter, all things considering. It's the start of a cleanup for SamSam!

* * *

10/09/04

Just woke up.

I had a nightmare and jerked awake. Luckily I didn't wake Carls.

The nightmare will not be described in detail, but it involved Carly, Jack, and a bunch of shit happening.

I'm glad I woke up before it got too bad. Of course, it was already about as bad as it was gonna get. Can't really see how it could have been worse.

Fuckin pervert would make the nightmare a reality if he could.

Gotta kill him sometime.

Just don't know when.

Think I'm gonna try to go back to sleep now. Wish me luck....

...

Well, it's almost dinner time now. Well, dinner for normal people. For me, it's lock-myself-in-my-room-so-Jack-can't-kill-me time.

Today started off a little awkward....

When I went back to sleep, I guess I had cuddled up to Carly in my sleep. She told me she woke up with my arm around her and my face pressed into her back. Apparently I had been mumbling something as well. That's never happened before.

I just told her I had a nightmare about algebra and I guess she was whatever was protecting me from it in the dream.

She laughed a little at that and all was good again. I'm so glad that, for the most part, she can accept things as I tell them to her. She doesn't have to be like Freddie who needs to know why or when or how.

School was boring, as normal. In math, Carls made a crack about the fake nightmare I told her about and we had a laugh at that.

Kids in class were annoying, they always were, just as the teacher is always a bitch. At least in my mind she is. Carls likes her. Not sure why or how, but she does.

When I got home, Jack made some comment to me that I ignored, Mom glared at me for some reason only she'll know, and I headed up to my room to 'finish my homework'.

Right…

Like I'd ever actually do that…I do enough in school to keep me in the same grade as Carly.

I've been sitting in my room, listening to music, and wondering when I'll get my phone back so I can call Carls. It wasn't until ten minutes ago I started writing all this shit down.

Hmm, the door bell just rang. Curiosity makes me wanna see who it is. No one ever rings our door bell. If anyone ever DOES 'visit' it's always a knock. The door bell hasn't been used in ages…

And Jackass is calling my name…Shit…Wonder who the hell it could be…

Assuming I survive, I'll write tomorrow.

Sam

* * *

So this was just kind of a buffer chapter. It introduces the next plot that I'm going to have to work around....Who could it be, though? Hrmmm...


End file.
